To Be Whole
by DemonAngel17
Summary: One shot about relationships and first love.


To Be Whole 2/3/2011 2:16 AM

Kagome loved school. Every morning she would wake up before her alarm would even go off. Of course, Kagome's love for school wasn't always so. She hated elementary school. She was constantly picked on because she was short, chubby and wore glasses. Other kids would steal from her, trip her, and call her ugly names. Yet she stood strong.

Kagome couldn't stay home, not that it was an option. And she couldn't tell her parents, seeing how they were too busy fighting to pay any attention to her and the new baby didn't help matters either. No matter how much she loved her new baby brother, she missed quiet nights.

Things got a little better when Kagome got to middle school. She made several new friends that stood up for her. That and her father got her contact lenses. She was still a few pounds heavier than the average girls and she perferred to spend her time studing or reading a good book rather that cheerleading or attending/ participating in sporting events; or attending school dances or parties. She however, managed to survive all three years in better spirits about school than in her younger years. Of course, the worse things got at home, the better her outlook on school became.

And so by the time she got to high school, she didn't want to go home. So she filled her time with extra curricular activities. Twice a week she had to go to school at 5 am for her Health Science Tech classes so that by the end of her 4 years of high school she would already be a Phlebotomy Tech and a Certified Nurse Assistant. After her health classes she attended her seven other classes, two of which her athletics and choir. Those two carried on after school. Soccer being from 4 to 6pm and choir from 3 to 4pm. Also weekend games and choir competitions kept her quite busy.

But what made school one hundred percent better? Her boyfriend. She had a boyfriend. Even though she told him she didnt have time to date, he persued her anyways. She couldn't even believe it sometimes. Especially when said boyfriend was one of the hottest boys in her grade. At 16, that is a big deal! But as the saying goes ' all good things must come to an end'.

"So does this mean you want to break up?" I asked softly, hoping with all my being he wouldn't answer that question. That is how it began, or I guess, ended.

She thought that the months the two of them had shared were some of the happiest, hardest, and most educational months she had ever experienced. It seemed impossible to her that this was the last conversation they would have as Kurama and Kagome, K&K, the couple.

I had ignored the fact that the majority of high-school relationships do not last. I guess in the back of my mind, I always thought that Kurama was the only boy I would ever have these feelings for, that he was the only boy who would ever understand me. I never took into account that the last month of our relationship was one of the hardest times I had ever gone through. It had just stopped being fun. It started to be about everything around Kurama and me and stopped being about us.

However she thought things would get better. She never expected for him to be the one to approach her and , in a mess of apologies and fumbled words, basically ending thier relationship. Yet she still asked because her brain refused to work. Her brain refused to awknowledge that this was really happening. He had promised to be with her, and after high school, he had promised to take her away from here, away from her father.

The next day at school Kagome tried looking great to make him see what he had given up. She even tried to talk to him like her heart wasn't aching, like she was better off and even happier. But inside she looked at him and could only see all the love and time she had given and all the hurt she had recieved.

For weeks Kagome walked around school in a complete daze and cried herself to sleep every night. At lunch her friends talked and at first tried to bring her to join in. Finally they gave up after she refused to respond. Kurama was the only thing Kagome thought about, dreamt about, and talked about, when ever she did talk. Kagome drove her friends crazy by constantly analyzing the situation. _'How could it have ended?' _Her friends just didn't understand how she felt. She found her other half when she was with him. She felt like something had been torn from her, like she was no longer whole.

One night, Kagome couldn't stand it. She gave up and picked up the phone.

"Hello?" his deep voice was music to her ears. How she had longed to hear his voice again.

"Hey, um, it's me Kagome."

"oh, hi." awkward silence.

"So how are you?" she asked.

"Good and you?" He countered.

She couldn't take it, she broke down and started crying. She told him she had forgotten how to be herself, and that she needed him.

"I don't know how to be Kagome without you! We have been through so much together that I can't imagine getting through this on my own."

"Kagome, I will always care for you but I can't take you back. It just became impossible to love you. I'm sorry."

For weeks Kagome couldn't bear to see him with other girls without thinking that they were dating, and so she threw herself at different guys. And though Inuyasha was gruff, alone he was quite nice. And Kouga was very affectionate and attentive, it just wasn't the same. So eventually she gave up dating.

Time continued to go by, and a some point things began to change. Kagome began spending time with her friends again. She joined other clubs and made other after school plans. She was doing all she could to stay busy.

Slowly Kagome began to have fun by herself, without Kurama. Beyond that, she discovered things she liked doing, ways she could be of help. Kagome even lent a sympathetic ear to others that were hurting.

After what seemed like forever, Kagome began to smile and finally, to laugh again. Whole days would pass without a thought of Kurama. She would even wave at him when she saw him at school. She was not ready to be friends with him yet though. She was still healing.

In her rebound stage, Kagome pursued a lot of guys. Once she let her wound heal itself adn felt enough pain to know that she truly cared for Kurama, guys pursued her. The wonderful thing that happened was that she learned how to be a whole person, not half a couple. She became involved in a new relationship and, even though he's great, eventually they will probably break up and she knows it will be hard and she will cry and feel just as much, if not more, pain. Kagome knows now that the famous qoute is true. "Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."


End file.
